How can a Pastor provide advice, counsel, and encouragement at the church when he, himself is having problems and is becoming a problem to the community?
Author Jeffery Trees shares a heartrending story of his experiences of learning that his first wife has repressed memories of being an incest victim, of being a Pastor at a church where no one could offer help, and of going through it all with his new wife who had a physical disability.
In his memoir, “Right in the Middle but Left Out”, he hopes that readers will find inspiration and hope from what he went through, so they can also stand up and get through with whatever issues or conflicts they are dealing with right now.
The author’s first wife was an incest victim as a child and when she was forced through circumstances to bring back up the repressed memories, each member of the family was changed. Nine months went by before his wife was able to express what she was dealing with. Society has made incest a taboo issue and no one knew the extent of such devastation this would bring into life for the author and his family, friends, Church and other employers, as well as insurance companies.
No one within the Church knew how to deal with issues of incest and what it does to a family and a Pastor never did anything to bring help into the situation. Even though he asked for help from the Bishop, District Superintendent and asked who was in charge of insurance, no help was ever given.
He asked for visitation for his wife and family and never received any help of any kind so there was no resolution. This even caused a deep problem with the Church with his new wife who had a physical disability. He became a problem rather than a pastor for the United Methodist Church. But through it all, God took care of everyone through His grace. And this proves that God is the refuge everyone seeks.